Charlie's Birth Story

I took a lot of care to prepare for Charlie’s birth.  I did some mental preparation by participating in Fear 2 Freedom and also taking the Birthing from Within class to help me be ready for this birth.  Physically I prepared by having chiropractic care throughout the pregnancy, resting more, and drinking a combination of herbal teas to strengthen me for birth.  I also knew more about what to do or not do for optimal fetal positioning.  I feel it all paid off and I am so glad I did it.  The journey didn’t unfold quite like any birth I have ever heard of, but it was exactly the birth that I wanted. 

 When I went for my appointment at 40 weeks and 6 days, I was anxious about starting labor.  I was anxious for Chubby’s well being and also for the possible interventions that would follow if labor didn’t start soon.  I saw Anjli that day and was prepared to ask her to strip my membranes to help start labor.  Anjli agreed to check me and found that I was 80% effaced, but had not dilated.  As always, Anjli had an idea for another thing to try and that was a combination of homeopathic medicines that are the essence of blue and black cohosh.  Mom and I headed directly to Whole Foods to pick them up and I started the first one Tuesday morning.

Tuesday evening I was more and more anxious that labor had not started.  People had made comments all day at work about how past my due date I was and I think it had gotten to me.  I went to bed early that evening worried that I would require a hospital induction and that would derail all the birth plans I had worked so hard for. 

I woke up about 9:30 that evening having mild contractions about every 10 minutes.  The regularity of them made me think they were different than the Braxton-Hicks contractions I had been having for weeks.  I sat on the birth ball and rocked on my hands and knees for a while before going back to bed.  When I woke up Wednesday morning, they were still present, but no different.  Aaron and I decided to work from home hoping that things would pick up and we would have a baby. 

It turned out to be a really relaxing day.  Jeanne’ came and took a long walk with me and we spent some time catching up.  After she left, Aaron and I went for lunch at a restaurant we had wanted to try.  My contractions stayed regular, but never very strong and not any closer together.  After lunch I took a long nap before Sarah Graves came home from school.  That evening, Aaron and I spent time giving Sarah Graves a bath and my mom came over and we made dinner and watched a movie, Wanderlust.  Throughout the day I had been in touch with my doula, Pam, letting her know that I was contracting, but nothing serious.  I sent her a text around 11 that evening letting her know that I was going to bed. 

I woke up about 2:30  a.m. and immediately noted that the contractions were different and much closer together.  I timed them for a bit and they were about 5 minutes apart and lasting nearly a minute.    I decided it was time to wake mom and Aaron and let them know that things were moving.  I also called Pam to alert her that things were changing and we would probably head to the hospital sometime in the next couple of hours.  Mom called Dad so that he could come and stay with Sarah Graves and I let Jeanne’ know that we would be going soon.  There was a flurry of activity and I moved through the house stopping to breathe through each contraction as it came.  Dad stayed with Sarah Graves and mom, Aaron, and Jeanne’ headed to the hospital with me. 

We arrived at the hospital around 4 a.m. and quickly were brought to a labor and delivery room.  The nurse put me on the monitor and examined me to find that I was dilated to 5 cm.  My contractions slowed down while I sat in the bed on the monitor and Chubby kept moving making it difficult for them to get a good read.  Pam quickly realized that we would never get off the monitor if they kept losing the heartbeat, so she generously offered to try to adjust the monitor to keep it on him as he moved.  After a really long time on the monitor it was agreed that he had no decelerations and a few accelerations making it fine to take me off the monitor.  The midwife on call that morning was Linda and she came by around 8:30 to check me and talk about how we would proceed.  I had dilated to 6 cm and the contractions remained spaced further out.  She suggested we break my water and have a baby in a couple of hours.  From the ultrasound the week before we knew that I had a really large amount of fluid and that was allowing the baby to stay up high.  Pam had mentioned that breaking my water may be the recommendation and we had thought it over and decided that we were not going to do that before we tried other things.  My main concern with breaking the water was that it could make Chubby come down really quick possibly causing a prolapsed cord and serious distress for him.  The other concern was that meconium in the fluid would mean I couldn’t get in the tub and that was important to me. At this point, I felt like Linda was frustrated with my decision and wasn’t really interested in discussing other ideas for getting the contractions moving.  She did agree to admit me, but quickly left and the nurse took over really checking on me.  Eilleen was the nurse on duty and she was very supportive.  She enjoyed singing and sang for us.  She also came by just to chat and check in with us.  My only complaint with that was that I preferred silence while I was contracting.  The contractions were uncomfortable, but not excruciating.  My way of coping with them was to sway, make a deep vocal noise, and close my eyes to go inside my mind to cope. 

Around 11 a.m. it was decided that I could get in the tub.  I was really thankful that Pam mentioned earlier that I might want to ask the nurse to set it up for me because it takes a while to set up and fill the tub.  Getting in the tub was immediately soothing.  The contractions were so easy in there, in fact, it made it too easy because they spaced out to about every 7 minutes.  I stayed in the tub all afternoon and got out when they needed to put me on the monitor to make sure Chubby was still doing well.  I had hoped that Jeanne' would be there to share the birth, but Dad had to leave to go out of town and Jeanne' graciously offered to stay with Sarah Graves.  It was hard to leave her, but I was thankful for the peace of mind that SG was well taken care of and happy.

I must confess that when the contractions were easy and spaced out, I started to think about the clock.  I knew that Anjli, my favorite midwife, came on call at 5 o’clock and part of me started thinking I could just hold out for her.  I think Linda was tired and fine with me just hanging out until she was finished for the day.  As the time grew closer to 5 it became obvious that we needed to come up with a plan because labor was stalling, even with me out of the water. 

Anjli came in to check me and found that I was still at 6 cm and I wasn’t that surprised.  The contractions hadn’t been strong enough or close enough together to do much.  Anjli noted that there was so much fluid that it was keeping Chubby’s head high.  We talked about options and decided that walking to get the contractions going was a good first option and that putting a small nick in the bag of waters was another option.  The nick would allow fluid to slowly drain and bring him down more gently rather than using the standard hook to break the bag.  I felt so good just talking about the possible options and what might make the best sense. 

I had some dinner and then Aaron and I went for a walk around the labor and delivery floor.  We walked for about 45 minutes and still the contractions were not very strong.  I came back to the room and realized I was starting to really tire out and got a little nervous that I might not have enough energy to make it through delivery.  We talked it over and decided nicking the bag of water was the next choice and asked Anjli to come back.  I stayed on the monitor for a while after the water was broken to make sure that Chubby didn’t show any signs of distress. 

Once it was determined that he was doing fine, I got in the shower to let the warm water relax me and hope that contractions would get going.  Aaron stayed with me in the shower and I did notice a few more, but they were still spaced out. 

After the shower I admitted that I was tired and starting to feel defeated that nothing was getting this going.  I told Pam that I was feeling tired and really wanted to lie down and rest before things got moving.  Pam agreed that moving and letting gravity work with me hadn’t been successful, so maybe rest was the best thing. 

I was getting on the bed ready to lie down when I felt a lot of fluid coming out and a huge contraction started.  On the next contraction I started shaking and feeling nauseous and told Pam that things were definitely moving now and that I agreed the nausea was a good sign of transition.  Within a few contractions Pam suggested that they start filling the tub up again and I agreed.  The contractions were coming so close together that I wasn’t getting any break and was starting to wonder if I had enough to get through it.  Time went by so fast for me, but I think it was about an hour and I was fully dilated.  Sometime in there I got in the tub and it took some of the edge off, but the contractions were strong and one seemed to fade into the next. 

I was on my hands and knees and I told Anjli that I felt like I needed to push.  She told me to go ahead that my body wasn’t lying to me.  I started pushing and it was intense.  I wanted so badly to have a break between contractions, but there wasn’t one.  A few times I wished that I could stop, but I knew there was no stopping now and I had to keep pushing to get him here.  After pushing for a while I could reach down and feel his head.  He was positioned posterior or face up, so it took a while for the head to come down.  That was a gratifying feeling to feel that head coming down.  There was intense burning and then finally his head was out and very quickly his body came too.  It was amazing to be able to reach down and feel him and turn my body over to be able to hold him.

He looked up at me and his eyes locked with mine; that was a moment I will never forget.  The lights were dim as I sat in the warm water and it felt like a private moment for just us.   I looked up and proclaimed that I had gotten the birth that I wanted!  We sat there for a little bit rubbing him and waiting for him to take a deep breath, but he was so calm that he just looked around.  Eventually, it was time for Aaron to cut the cord and bring Charlie over to be checked out and they helped me out of the tub.  I couldn’t believe how quickly and easily the placenta came out and Chubby was given back to me to nurse. 

He quickly started eating and Anjli sewed up a tear that happened during the birth.  I was on cloud nine not able to believe that he was born and it had all gone so well.   I had wanted a water birth so much, but more than that I wanted a birth that felt joyful and one where I felt present in it and that is exactly what I got.  I could not have asked for better support from the people there with me that night   Everyone knew what I wanted and that was taken into consideration in every decision that was made.  So yes it was a long labor and it was really hard work, but it was the most empowering thing that I have done. 

August 22, 2012

11:30 am - Natalie calls to say she's been contracting since 9:30 last night. Her contractions are 10 minutes apart(ish), but mild and short. Nothing seems to change them, neither walking, movement,

nor soaking in warm water.

6:07 pm – a text from me:  How are things with you? I've been thinking of you all day, Natalie.

7:51 pm – text from Natalie: I took a nice nap and woke up to my lower back hurting.  Hands and knees seems to help that.  SG is about to go to bed so I will try to figure out if the contractions are much closer together.  They feel a bit, but it is hard to say when you are focusing on a 2-year-old.

text from me: It might help to do lots of pelvic tilts while you're on hands and knees. Keep me posted after SG goes to bed.

10:44 pm – text from Natalie: Still contracting about every 7 minutes and lasting about 45 seconds.  They are a little stronger, but still not hard.  I am going to get some sleep.

August 23, 2012

1:03 am – text from me: Thanks for the update, Natalie. I slept through the text (would not have slept through a phone call). Rest well. Contact me any time, but call if you want to be certain I hear you.

2:35 am - Natalie calls. She slept several hours. Contractions are now 5 minutes apart and much stronger. She and Aaron are making arrangements and thinking of leaving in about an hour.

3:25 am - They are heading to the hospital, as am I.

4:30 am – We’re at AMC, in LDR 10 with Tricia, and Janea. Natalie is dilated 4.5-5 cm and is 80% effaced. Charlie is still high in her pelvis, but this is not a concern, especially with a second baby. Ashley is Natalie’s nurse. Linda will be here shortly.

6:30 am - Natalie is STILL on the monitor, working harder and contractions are now 2-3.5 minutes apart.

When Linda came in earlier, she made a comment about "early" and went to sleep.

7:40 am – Eileen is Natalie’s new nurse. She sings "when you wish upon a star" to her captive audience.

8:30 am – Linda’s vaginal exam shows Natalie’s cervix is now dilated 6 cm. She is still 80% effaced and her Chubby is at -2 station. Linda offers AROM, but Natalie declines and asks how soon she can get in the tub.

9:50 am - Natalie is “labor shopping” for SG while the tub is being set up, but not filled. Eileen says she is waiting for Natalie to want it filled.

10:10 am -Tricia and Aaron share some light hearted moments. I love this family! Natalie is signing consents with Eileen before getting in tub

11:11 am - Natalie is in the tub. She was ready. She's no longer comfortable between contractions. YAY!

11:50 am - Natalie is tired. She’s napping in the tub between contractions, which are now 6-7 minutes apart.

1:15 pm – Natalie’s contractions are now 4-5 minutes apart and more intense.

4:10 pm - Natalie is out of the tub. She has lots of bloody show. She’s going to be monitored again.

4:30 pm – Natalie has a new nurse, Linda.

5:30 pm – Upon arrival, Anjli examines Natalie. She is now 5-6 cm dilated, with Charlie at -3 station and blaudible. Anjli asks if labor might still be early. She offered for Natalie and Aaron to walk or go home. She also offered to break Natalie’s amniotic sac with internal fetal monitor probe, in order to create a trickle of fluid and, hopefully, move labor along with less risk of prolapsed cord. Natalie declines and opts, instead, for a dinner of turkey and dressing. 

7:35 pm – Anjli now does a gentle amniotomy with internal monitor lead. Fluids are clear! Natalie is tired and wants to get things moving. She has another new nurse, Sylvia!

8:45 pm ­- Natalie is getting in the shower. Baby Charlie is happy. Contractions are closer and stronger.

10:30 pm - Natalie vomits; that’s a promising sign! Then, she gets back in the tub. She is working hard.

10:50 pm – Natalie is pushing

11:37 pm - Charles Matthew Caldwell is born! He makes his appearance sunny side up, which might explain his unusual labor. He is happy and healthy, weighing in at 8 pounds, 13 ounces and measuring 21 inches tall. 

A few minutes after Charlie arrives, Natalie pushes out their placenta without any of the issues she had hoped to avoid. She has been stoic and steadfastly patient throughout this birth – a birth warrior, for sure!

It has been an honor to share this birth with this dear family. I cherish them.

Pam Roe

Labor of Love Doula and Childbirth Services, Inc